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Monday, May 24, 2010

Have and Have Nots

In forming the Asperger Women Association, I have learned about so many who have not lead happy lives with their autism. I, also, met many who have.

The Haves and Have Nots of Happiness.

With anything in our lives, it is up to our parents and ourselves to learn to adapt and live in society as much as we can and are willing. "Can and Willing" both determine the Haves and Have Nots.

I considered myself a happy person and have lead a good , happy life, notwithstanding the fact that everyone has had challenges in their lives and difficult times. What makes those who focus on the unachievable and unhappy, versus, those who focus on the good things in life? I really do not believe Autism is the cause but the person and their respective upbringing and own chosen approach to life.

"I complained I had no shoes until I met a man who had no feet"
Some of us are very lucky to have had parents who loved us and guided us in society. It made it easier for us as adults. Except for the worst cases of abuse, there is no reason an adult cannot work with themselves to be the best they can and have the happiest life they can.

I have learned I was autistic at the age of 56 and it has answered and challenged my identity as I have known it over half a century. My psychiatrist who diagnosed me stated "You shot from the hip in the dark and did everything right" . His treatment... keep doing what I have been doing but get more rest. Yet I had no diagnosis, no program,no special treatment in most my life, and found people and things in life that helped me to be the best I wanted to be.

I have been happily married for 35 years and raised our daughter who is now 28 years old and the co author of our up coming book "Pleasantly Eccentric "©2009. There is so much she and I would like to share with the world of "living with autism" for over half a century, being a daughter, wife, and mother who is autistic , and raising a child who is Neuro-Typical. There is so much denial that autism existed in the past because most people have died and could not speak up for themselves today , so, hopefully, I, and many others my age and older will be able to document autistic people and families of the present and past. Lives which lived with no early diagnosis, no special treatments, nor special considerations.

I see my aspergers as a plus in my life. It has brought be an incredible world in my mind which I have lived to express in many art forms. God has blessed me. By the same token it has given me challenges to live in a social world where I was not blessed with instinctive natural abilities to speak a social language. I had to create my own system to live and communicate socially with Neuro-Typicals who need social interaction like a language, similar to the dolphins who swim in harmonious intertwined circles which have social and emotional language.

How did I do it? How did I manage as a Female Aspie? I will be sharing this all with you.